EPISODE 23 TRANSCRIPT
Like the MFM podcast this site is not about big facts and truths so somethings may be incorrect.
June 30, 2016
23 – Makeing A Twenty-Thrider
Karen & Georgia focus on their favorite survivor murder stories, featuring an escape from The Chessboard Killer, and the harrowing story of a pregnant woman fighting for her life. Plus a rad listener hometown murder and tons of banter.
Episode 23: SE7ENteen By Cora E.
Feral Audio
*My Favorite Murder Theme Song*
Karen: Welcome
*both laughing*
Georgia: What you couldn’t see is Karen and I just smiling... creepily
Karen: Just doing fake podcast faces to each other as we were about to introduce us. (pause)Welcome to My Favorite Murder (pause) starring Georgia Hardstark. (pause) That’s her.
Georgia: Hi
Karen: And Karen Kilgariff
Georgia: Hi
Karen: That’s me.
Georgia: You’re really good at um, like, long pauses, so I’m like “Is she waiting for me to jump in?”
*Karen laughing*
Karen: You mean I’m good at like, putting them in and making you unsure as to what you’re supposed to do?
Georgia: Yes. But, that’s us.
Karen: I like to keep mystery in the relationship.
Georgia: You look tan.
Karen: Uhh…
*Karen laughing*
Georgia: Did you go tan?
Karen: No...I have a red face because, um, my favorite celebrity was talking to me on Twitter.
*Georgia gasps*
Georgia: Shut up! (laughing)
Karen: And so my cheeks got really red and they wouldn’t stop being red.
Georgia: Wow! Karen, it’s like significant.
*Karen laughing*
Karen: I know!
Georgia: I’ve never seen you blush before!
Karen: I know! This is what it looks like.
Georgia: Holy shit! You don’t have to say who it is, but Oh my god.
Karen: I know. Well, he knows who he is. ‘Cause that’s why he talked to me.
Georgia: You get flushed when someone talks to you that you like?
Karen: Ya.
Georgia: That’s cute! I’ve never seen you speak to someone you like then.
Karen: Is it cute? I know. It doesn’t happen that often.
Georgia: You don’t like any of our friends...
Karen: It’s just, you know, there’s some good uses for Twitter, that’s all I’ll say.
Georgia: That’s so cute!
Karen: *sarcastically* Aren’t I precious? Also, I was driving into the sun essentially,
Georgia: Oh, okay.
Karen: driving home from work, so, it was a combo thing too.
Georgia: I also don’t think I’ve never seen your arms
*Karen laughs*
Georgia: You took your sweater off because it’s a hundred thousand degrees in my apartment,
Karen: Ya, that’s right!
Georgia: and you’re tan as fuck!
Karen: Ya, I guess I am a little bit! I think this is just from, um, how hot it’s been lately.
Georgia: I really never, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you in a short-sleeved shirt. Your adorable freckles. Let’s talk about you.
*Karen laughs*
Georgia: You have adorable freckles and you’re tan!
Karen: Uh huh... Well, ya, I think that these parts...I mean look at this farmer’s tan, though.
Georgia: That’s hilarious.
Karen: I gotta start working on that.
*Georgia laughing*
Georgia: That is a gnarly farmer’s tan!
Karen: Do not take a picture of this.
*Georgia laughing*
Karen: Could you imagine?
Georgia: It’s pretty sweet.
Karen: It looks like I’m an apple picker, professionally,
Georgia: Oh, it totally does.
Karen: this farmer’s tan that I have going.
Georgia: It totally does.
Karen: Um…oh no, summer Karen is in full effect right now.
Georgia: I got Botox today.
Karen: You did?
*both laughing*
Georgia: If we’re gonna go ahead and talk about...
Karen: This is full… let’s just tell all of our secrets.
Karen: God, I wish had like, what is it called…tact? Uh...
*Karen laughing*
Georgia: Any kind of shame?
Karen: I love it!
Georgia: Secrets are the...
Karen: Well who cares? At this point everyone gets it!
Georgia: Oh my god, if I cared that people… like I was trying to hide Botox? That wouldn’t be me. It’s like lying about your age. What’s the point?
Karen: Also every person that lives in this town would have to be hiding it.
Georgia: Ya, and you know what else? Half the other people should get Botox.
*Karen laughing*
Georgia: ‘Cause fuck. It’s like the best. It’s the best!
Karen: Um, wait, let me put my glasses back on.
Georgia: Ok, you can’t tell. It takes like a week for it to work but you can see like a little bit a bruise coming up.
Karen: Oh. And then what happens? Everything tightens up?
Georgia: Ya, it doesn’t tighten, it just kind of...ya. It just uh...the muscles stop working so there’s no wrinkles.
Karen: Oh! Interesting.
Georgia: It’s great.
*Karen laughing*
Georgia: I love it. And I don’t care how fucking vapid I sound. But it’s not vapid, I’m not...
Karen: It’s not vapid! You’re an on-camera personality.
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: This kind of shit, you just don’t. I mean, people know. Like when you see yourself on camera it’s the physical equivalent of when you hear your voice on an answering machine.
Georgia: Ugh. Ya.
Karen: It’s nightmarish. Or on a podcast.
Georgia: Especially HD on a huge TV.
Karen: Oh please!
Georgia: And in general too, it makes me feel better about myself!
Karen: Of course!
Georgia: So who fucking cares!
Karen: And also, every single person that you see on television over the age of 12 is filled with Botox.
Georgia: For sure. You know why? ‘Cause it’s awesome.
*Karen laughing*
Karen: 'Cause it works!
Georgia: It’s so...it’s so great.
Karen: Until they start…what they need to do is they need develop some kind of a computer program that can just automatically go in and pull out wrinkles.
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: That’s what they need to do. But until then it’s on the individual performer.
Georgia: And it’s…aw, man. I love it, I don’t care.
Karen: You just love it. Do you feel like spinning in a circle? Like a pretty girl in a dress with an apron on the front?
Georgia: I get carsick really easily so I think that would be mistake. BUT…I give money to charity too, it’s not like this is my only…
Karen: Girl, you’re in Hollywood! You’re a Hollywood on-camera presence. You are a star of the Food Network. You’re a dessert queen.
Georgia: Thank you!
Karen: We don’t want wrinkles in that shit!
Georgia: No. I don’t need it.
Karen: Although I…have them and I support them a hundred percent.
Georgia: No you, ya.
Karen: I have a crevice in my forehead that awhile ago I was like “Fuck it. I’m gonna go with this.”
Georgia:Ya?
Karen: Like um,
Georgia: Like how grey hair women are like “I’m just gonna let my hair fucking go grey!”
Karen: I can’t do that yet because if I did I could go completely grey, really fast.
Georgia: No, I like your dark hair.
Karen: I need it.
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: I need it.
Georgia: I feel the same way with bangs. Like I just...they’re my comfort. I need them.
Karen: Exactly. This is.. I need some dark hair leftover from my nineties, mod… we call it a mod/goth…
Georgia: Ya
Karen: ...phase. I didn’t really ever commit to anything entirely except for beer.
*both laughing*
Karen: But, I need the hair. I need some darkness around me...
Georgia: Sure.
Karen: ...at all times.
Georgia: Bangs and a fucking bob haircut.
Karen: And a strong lip. And a hoop earring.
Georgia: And a beer.
Karen: And a…ahhh…if only.
Georgia: Ya…and ya like lip-liner only. And no lipstick. Yes.
*Karen laughing*
Karen: Wait, what are we talking about now?
Georgia: I don’t know I just kind of went that way! Hey, I finished The Simpson Show. The new…
Karen: Oh, I haven’t.
Georgia: ...The new Simpsons.
Karen: And you love it?
Georgia: So we’re talking about the O.J. Simpson Made in America documentary
Karen: Unbelievable.
Georgia: Did you watch...did you see the crime scene photos?
Karen: No.
Georgia: For f…Oh my...Okay, so here’s what they do. Everyone was like Episode 4...hardcore crime scene photos, like just be prepared. So they showed them…
Karen: 4 or 5?
Georgia: 4.
Karen: Okay, then I’m…I think I’m halfway through 4, so I haven’t seen the hardcore ones.
Georgia: Okay. So they show them, and I’m like “Oh. I must be so fucking crazy and desensitized ‘cause this is nothing.” It was just like “oh.” And suddenly it’s a fucking up close of her neck wound.
Karen: Oh no.
Georgia: Of Nicole Simpson’s, sorry, of Nicole Brown’s neck wound.
Karen: I haven’t seen that.
Georgia: Like no warning. And I thought like “Oh, I can see that.” Like her sad, sad crumpled body. His body, really kind of did get to me. (pause) Ron Goldman, man.
Karen: It’s so sad.
Georgia: I just… (sighs) You know he like, came upon her being attacked. It’s not even like… I always thought that they were there together, and O.J. freaked out because he thought they were dating?
Karen: Right.
Georgia: He wasn’t even there yet when the attack on Nicole started.
Karen: Ugh…
Georgia: That poor kid.
Karen: Do they say that in the documentary?
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: That’s like proven fact?
Georgia: It’s, ya.
Karen: Ugh, that’s a nightmare.
Georgia: She got attacked during…and fell to the ground. And that’s when he came in.
Karen: Ugh.
Georgia: And he was just bringing her mom’s reading glasses she left at the restaurant where he waited tables.
Karen: Ya. That’s right. Nightmare. And nightmare for that mom. I mean, she would, I mean...
Georgia: Oh ya! ‘Cause
Karen: ...to have that connection of like “Oh I needed my glasses back.”
Georgia: Totally.
Karen: And then they, ya. Horrible.
Georgia: That bothered me and I keep thinking about him and his… Anyway.
Karen: It’s not good.
Georgia: Um, ya, so you should finish it.
Karen: I will definitely finish it. *chuckling* I think it’s like every time I go home after a day of work where I’m like, a bit wrung out, a little tired, I just want to listen to British people. Oh...
Georgia: Oh, I tried it!
Karen: Speaking of which… what? The Tunnel?
Georgia: The show.
Karen: It’s a reading show. I tried to watch episode 2 last night and I fell asleep almost immediately. And I kept closing my eyes going “Now I don’t know what’s happening ‘cause I’m not looking. ‘Cause I’m not reading.” But I love it!
Georgia: I was bored.
Karen: You didn’t like it?!
Georgia: Four minutes in. Four minutes in! I’m gonna try it again and try it some more.
Karen: Too much reading?
Georgia: No, um…Too like fucking *dramatically* dramatic. Like too dramatic, like just too like... You know like, the cute officer is like “Cheerio! You can take the body and like take this murder, it’s all yours, byeeeee!” And then it’s like *dramatically* but then the body,
falls apart in half, and...
Karen: Spoiler alert.
Georgia: What?
*Karen laughing*
Karen: The body falls apart.
Georgia: Oh…oh shit! *laughing* But that was in the first two minutes! It’s...you know what I mean.
Karen: No I think um...I hear what you’re saying. I accept what you’re saying. I think it’s interesting though. Like, I like that it’s like the French female cop who’s, of course a beautiful
young French actress but is also playing this borderline autistic, very all business...
Georgia: Bitchy, kind of.
Karen: ...bitchy and like, kind of like “I don’t care if you’re making a joke, I don’t care if you’re being charming.
Georgia: I’m saying, but I’m saying...I want everyone to know I’m saying bitchy like BITCHY, like it’s fucking awesome.
Karen: It is awesome.
Georgia: I don’t feel like, *spoiled voice* “What a bitch!” Bitchy is cool.
Karen: We like bitchy.
Georgia: Um, I’m going to try it again. I pretty much 90% of the time, hate every show, like the first 10 minutes.
Karen: Ya.
Georgia: I’m like, “I hate this show.”
Karen: ‘Cause it’s hard to get used to new things.
Georgia: That’s true. Speaking of new things, I have a present.
*Karen gasps*
Karen: Oh!
Georgia: For you and for me.
Karen: Oooh!
Georgia: From a listener.
*Karen gasps*
Karen: Is this our first listener, like, viewer mail?
Georgia: Ya I have…
Karen: Like, listener mail?
Georgia: ...I have a, don’t worry, I have a P.O. Box…
Karen: Good.
Georgia: So if anyone wants to send us shit, you can message me, and if you’re not insane and have okay grammar I’ll give you our P.O. Box number.
*Karen laughs*
Georgia: Um, so, Caroline Abernathy sent us a present...
Karen: Ah! Caroline!
Georgia: ...to my P.O. Box, she’s a sweet baby angel.
Karen: Have you already opened it?
Georgia: I fucking have and I know…she already, she was like “I’m sending you this thing”, I’m like “Great…
Karen: Oh awesome!
Georgia: …I’ll tell Karen.” So...
Karen: ‘Cause the first thing I thought of “It’s full of live moths.”
*Georgia laughing*
Georgia: I haven’t opened it.
Karen: Something creepy
*Karen laughing*
Georgia: Kaboom! And that’s how they died. So, she sells this in her Etsy shop.
*Karen gasping*
Georgia: It’s called, her Etsy shop is Animegravy with a capital A. I don’t know if that’s necessary, like you have to put that in or whatever. Are you ready for this present?
Karen: Yes.
Georgia: Okay, I have to put my mic down real quick.
Karen: She’s unrolling a small p…*gasping* It’s the stay sexy don’t get murdered with Elvis and the owl poster!! We each have our own?!
Georgia: Yes!
Karen: Oh, my god! This is gorgeous!
*Georgia squealing*
Georgia: I know! So this chick, so, for new listeners…I mean, get with the program, but… uh, so we always...
*Karen laughing*
Karen: First of all, first of all, let us reprimand you for being...
Georgia: Right
Karen: This is amazing.
Georgia: So, “stay sexy don’t get murdered” is our catch… the thing we always say.
*Karen laughing*
Karen: Our catch phrase.
Georgia: Our catch phrase? No, it’s just something we started saying saying and
people like it.
Karen: My catch phrase is “What are you talking about, Willis?”
*both laughing*
Georgia: That’s right I forgot, okay. And then Elvis, my cat… is holding, like a cookie… it looks just like him.
Karen: It looks exactly like him.
Georgia: And then the owl of course is the owl theory from The Staircase.
*Karen laughing*
Karen: Which is very funny, a lot of people have pointed out on the Facebook page, we’ve never really talked about that on the podcast.
Georgia: Wow! Yeah!
Karen: It’s just something you and I have personally talked about and just referenced…
Georgia: Right. We’ve mentioned it being a theory…
Karen: Ya.
Georgia: ...but we haven’t like, discussed if we believe it or not.
Karen: I think it’s like we’ve discussed how we’ve discussed it essentially...
Georgia: Right.
Karen: ...so there’s a lot of people who are like “Wait! When did they talk about this?!”
Georgia: It’s discussed. It’s disgusted.
Karen: Ya. It is disgusting. It is amazing
Georgia: And look at, it’s like… it’s like the colors of my walls, too, it’s like this...
Karen: Ya, that’s weird!
Georgia: ...mint green I’m obsessed with.
Karen: Beautiful.
Georgia: It’s so cute.
Karen: This is the best!
Georgia: So you guys can go to Animegravy.com and you can buy it. I wanna tell everyone it’s just $10 but I feel like she should up the price right now.
Karen: It’s worth more than $10.
Georgia: It’s only $25!
Karen: Caroline Abernathy?
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: That’s really cool.
Georgia: Thank you so much for this. She wrote a, should I, I haven’t read the note actually. Oh, let’s see. Should I read the note?
Karen: Yes.
Georgia: “Dear Karen and Georgia, I’m so happy that you like my drawing! Thanks for always making me laugh then feel bummed as fuck about all the murders then smile again by asking Elvis if he wants a cookie…
*Karen laughing*
Georgia: ...I’ve introduced multiple friends to your podcast. It’s the perfect friend filter to see who’s cool enough to hang out with Murderinos…
Karen: Yay!
Georgia: ...thanks. You two rock so fucking hard. Stay sexy, don’t get murdered. -Caroline.”
Karen: Thank youuuuu.
Georgia: Oh my god, that’s, I love it so much.
Karen: That’s really exciting.
Georgia: I’m going to get it framed.
Karen: I love it. Now greedily the next thing I was immediately gonna say is Now I want one of those little key, like those little pendants that say “stay sexy don’t get murdered.”
Georgia: We need to give her a shout out. Let me see here.
Karen: I think we did once?
Georgia: We totally have.
Karen: That’s the one who’s named Flossie, right?! Or am I, is that a...
Georgia: Let’s, let’s, hey Steven, will you look that up for us? *laughing* Since you’re here?
*Karen laughing*
Karen: Oh you guys this week, we have a sound recording engineer.
Georgia: Remember how we had technical difficulties last week, Steven?
Steven: I’m helping the sound not get murdered.
Georgia: Thank you!
Karen: Yes.
Georgia: Steven Ray Morris who you know and love from the Facebook group is helping us, because tech diffs last week.
Karen: Um hmm. We’re trying to get up, we’re just trying to be professional. You know how we, you know how we strive and aspire to be better every week.
Georgia: I’ve never felt worse about, like been more bummed about not having a belch ready when you said that.
*Karen laughing*
Georgia: And you like, you know me, I fucking belch.
Karen: Get one ready and then drop it in as a surprise at some point during the podcast.
Georgia: And it will.
Karen: Okay good.
Georgia: Do you have any housekeeping?
Karen: *singing* Housekeeping!
Georgia: Okay, the shirts are so…the shirts are done printing.
Karen: Nice.
Georgia: They’re going to the uh, the whatever, shipper this week.
Karen: Nice.
Georgia: I don’t know the rest.
Karen: I mean, I think as long as people know what the schedule is...
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: ...it’ll help so they just don’t think they threw $25 to the wind.
Georgia: No. The shirts are coming, I’m sorry.
Karen: We’ll all get them at the same time…
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: …we’ll all have a whole shirt discussion
Georgia: Right. Totally.
Karen: We’ll all wear them on the same day.
Georgia: Yes.
Karen: It’s gonna be crazy.
Georgia: And also on our Patreon, I’m posting some of the better, uh, hometown murders we’ve been emailed?
Karen: Oh ya.
Georgia: Just as a blog post for free because they’re so good and whatever. So go to our Patreon. Anyways.
Karen: Our Patreon that we still don’t have it set up correctly, right?
Georgia: It’s set up, we just haven’t put any paid content on it yet?
Karen: Oh, okay.
Georgia: I don’t know…..
Karen: Alright.
Georgia: It’s like I don’t….
Karen: We’ll do that, we were gonna…we’ll do that.
Georgia: We’re both so rich. Do we need the money?
Karen: I mean, ya, seriously. I have absolutely no financial worries whatsoever.
*Georgia laughing*
Georgia: Ditto!
Karen: My whole face turns red again.
*Georgia laughing*
Georgia: Um, do you have any housekeeping
Karen: Um, I don’t think so. Except for I got up this morning, I wanna say, thank you and yet god damn you Facebook page because I got up this morning…Every morning I wake up like between 6:30 and 7…
Georgia: Jesus fucking Christ.
Karen: And I have to be at work at 10:30. And most of the time I walk in at 10:31 or 10:29. Because I start drinking coffee, and reading that Facebook page and I can’t stop. And it’s so crazy and it’s the hugest time suck like I should save it for the evening. But I love getting up and just, I mean, you know… it’s my favorite.
Georgia: I have the opposite. I can’t go to sleep until 2 in the morning…
Karen: Because you’re on it?
Georgia: I’m just scrolling. It’s so good.
Karen: We’re just bookending that thing.
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: It’s really fun. And uh, and ya so join it if you haven’t yet.
Georgia: Oh I just remembered! So, that podcast that I love? That I go to sleep to?
Karen: YA.
Georgia: Called Sleep With Me podcast?
Karen: Ya.
Georgia: He gave us a shout out.
*Karen gasps*
Georgia: He gave me a shout out and gave My Favorite Murder a shout out.
Karen: Georgia!
Georgia: I was listening to it, and I’m so sorry I was fast-forwarding in the beginning because he talks about like who’s… oh, we have the person who…
Karen: Oh, let’s see. Her name.
Steven: Is it one, is it one of those people?
Karen: Yes it is.
Steven: Cool.
Georgia: But I don’t know which one.
Karen: I just touched the picture, should something happen?
Georgia: No. We don’t know yet.
Karen: It’s that one.
Steven: Oh, okay cool. I’ll continue my search.
Karen: We just have to do this step by step, thank you.
Georgia: Um…I was fast-forwarding through the part that I don’t care about, the beginning.
Karen: See? Everybody’s a skipper in some way.
Georgia: I skip the very beginning but not the like, good stuff. So and I hear Georgia H.” as I’m skipping and I was like “Wait a second.”
Karen: Heyy….
Georgia: And I go back and he was like, he’s like so sweet he gives everybody a shout out. So, and he said “My Favorite M.” Dial M For…like he could...honestly podcast, he didn’t want to say the word murder...
Karen: Oh!
Georgia: …which I love.
Karen: That’s sweet!
Georgia: Ya. If you guys have insomnia, listen to the Sleep With Me podcast, it’s my new Ambien.
Karen: That’s great.
Georgia: It’s so fucking good.
Karen: That’s, really, ah! That’s so exciting.
Georgia: Isn’t that nice?
Karen: Oh, you know what? We got a shout out, and people have talked about it on The Dollop.
*Georgia laughing*
Karen: And…I just wanted to give people, we already talked about how he called Georgina Hoobastank. I don’t know if he, he asked me for your email, so...
Georgia: He hasn’t emailed me yet.
Karen: Okay. I’m sure he’s gonna email you a long and involved apology.
Georgia: I’m sure it’s an apology.
Karen: But if you like, The Dollop is Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds. And they tell weekly, uh, I think it’s actually bi-weekly, um. They go over crazy historical stories from America, Australia, anywhere. Um, and they’re...
Georgia: So cool.
Karen: ...insane! Like there’s this one I would start with that’s about bathing suits, like men’s bathing suits and the Y...
*Georgia gasping*
Karen: …you know that boys and men used to be required to swim naked until like the sixties?
Georgia: No!
Karen: I swear to god, it’s the craziest story where you’re like *gasping*…it’s like, anyway
Georgia: I love facts. I love fucking stupid historical…I LOVE stupid historical facts that you just like wouldn’t know.
Karen: That’s The Dollop a hundred percent.
Georgia: Ugh.
Karen: Dave basically reads the story, Garreth’s never heard the story before...
Georgia: And he does what I do? *gasping* “No!
Karen: Yes, exactly. And then just like riffs. It’s really hilarious. It’s one of my favorite
podcasts. But anyway, so they gave us a shout out, so all these people were like “Oh, that’s so weird, I love that podcast.” and then so Dave told me, I said, I texted Dave and said, “thank you.” and then I said “Is it okay if I tell them that you were my first comedy boyfriend?”
*Georgia gasping*
*Karen laughing*
Karen: Because Dave Anthony and I dated in the nineties.
Georgia: Like boyfriend boyfriend?
Karen: Ya he was my boyfriend.
Georgia: Holy shit.
Karen: He was my first real boyfriend when I lived in San Francisco.
Georgia: Oh my god!
Karen: And so, I said “Is it okay if I tell them you were my first comedy boyfriend?” and then he just texted back in all caps “THERE WERE OTHERS” which was hilarious.
*Georgia laughing*
Karen: So I think people like a little inside…
Georgia: Ya!
Karen: …like inside scoop of fun stuff ‘cause people just think that we’re all like… I just think it’s funny that people are like, “That’s so weird that my favorite...
Georgia: Right.
Karen: …podcast The Dollop gave a shout out to My Favorite Murder” and it’s like yeah, I’ve known Dave for almost 30 years.
Georgia: Ya. Well, I feel like the comedy, the comedian people, you’ve met them all. And I actually asked you before, like “Hey, can I give this podcast a shout out?” because I don’t know if you hate *laughing* this comedian...
Karen: Always good to check.
*Karen laughing*
Georgia: Like you might have history with this fucking person, and I’m like…
Karen: I definitely will.
Georgia: Are you gonna be pissed that I…
Karen: Right.
Georgia: So ya, you know. I mean you know everyone. Okay. We know who these keychains are made by. They’re metal and they’re stamped with “stay sexy don’t get murdered” and they’re amazing.
Steven: With a little heart at the bottom.
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: Yes.
Steven: It’s by Etsy Seller My Heart Has Plans.
Georgia: Do it.
Karen: My heart has plans.
Georgia: That’s adorable.
Steven: So if you just...I honestly just Googled “stay sexy don’t get murdered Etsy”...
*Georgia gasping*
Steven: ...and that was like the first thing, and then the cross-stitching one that popped up.
Karen: Oh ya.
Georgia: Oh my god! Shit comes up
Karen: There’s some good stuff on there.
Georgia: Dude. We’re Googleable.
Karen: Oh, uh we, I think um…Ary, or Alex asked us if it was okay if people post their Etsy shop links on the page.
Georgia: Please.
Karen: Right?
Georgia: Please do!
Karen: A hundred percent.
Georgia: Make that money!
Karen: Please. If you have, I mean, it does have to be relevant to our podcast, though.
Georgia: Right.
Karen: You can’t just have any old…
Georgia: No.
Karen: …crazy yarn doll that you make. Let’s not get nuts.
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: Although someone did tweet me a picture that they made of a little Richard Ramirez.
Georgia: Aww!
Karen: Did you see that on the Twitter?
Georgia: That’s relevant.
Karen: They may have done it straight to my...
Georgia: Oh! I think I did.
Karen: Or did, were you on there?
Georgia: Does he have fucked up teeth?
Karen: No! *laughing* That would be so amazing. If she had pushed in little real baby teeth.
Georgia: Ohhh
Karen: Oh, Richard!
Georgia: *baby talk* oh my god!
Karen: You poor little monster.
Georgia: Little shards of teeth.
Karen: I think that’s it. I think that’s our housekeeping.
Georgia: Alright thanks for listening. Byee, no.
Karen: Bye we have to go.
Georgia: There’s a whole breeze into the podcast.
*Karen laughing*
Georgia: Am I first this week?
Karen: Ya I think I was first last week.
Georgia: I think you’re right.
Karen: With the old Sawn Beans.
Georgia: Oh right. So last week we did a 1500s murder which we were both like “that was a mistake.”
*Karen laughing*
Karen: What I liked when I re-listened to it, we just, it’s just so clearly reading…
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: ...it was like we were being forced to read book reports in front of our class.
*Georgia laughing*
Georgia: Totally.
Karen: That’s what it sounded like. We tried to have fun with it but I mean, you know.
Georgia: Okay so we gave ourselves another, we gave ourselves an “I survived” theme? And I think from now on, let’s do a couple more weeks of no theme.
Karen: No theme.
Georgia: After this. But I do like this one.
Karen: Once again did you get painted into a box?
Georgia: No no no! I like this one, I think it’s cool and it’s something I’ve never heard of, and it’s creepy and fucked up, and...
Karen: Oh good okay
Georgia: ...and I like it for sure. But, I like to go wild.
*Karen laughing*
Karen: You just like to be yourself and decide what you want to do at the last second.
Georgia: *valley girl voice* You know what I mean? I wanna do me.
Karen: *valley girl voice* You’re just on your journey…
*Georgia laughing*
Karen: I’m positive that my vocal fry has gotten worse since we started this podcast.
Georgia: You sound a little like you’re getting over a thing.
Karen: You know what’s weird? I had a little throaty feeling last night.
Georgia: Or are you getting over hanging out with me and taking my and like...
Karen: I’m over it.
Georgia: ...then getting my vocal fry.
*Karen laughing*
Karen: It’s catching.
Georgia: You know who hates vocal fry? Is 52-year old single divorced dads. Those are the only people who complain about it.
Karen: Sounds like you’re thinking of someone very specific.
Georgia: *fake crying* my own...No, my dad’s….My dad, did you see my dad keeps commenting on our shit?
Karen: Ya he’s totally into it, isn’t he?
Georgia: He keeps writing like, he always writes like “You go, girl!”
*Karen laughing*
Georgia: He’s seriously like, I used to have a blog and I didn’t tell them about it and then I started getting posts that were like “You go, girl.” and I’m like “That’s my fucking dad, I know it.”
*Karen laughing*
Georgia: And then one day he was like “So how’s your blog?”
Karen: His name’s Martin, right?
Georgia: Marty.
Karen: Marty!
Georgia: Marty was like “How’s your blog?” I fucking knew you were “you go girl”
Karen: He loves you, he’s so proud of you.
Georgia: He’s so sweet, he’s so supportive
Karen: My dad heard from…He said “Hey there’s a fireman whose daughter and all her friends listen to your murder podcast.”
Georgia: Shut up!
Karen: I swear to god and I was like “uh oh.” He texted it to me, he said. “What’s it called?” and I said “My Favourite Murder” and goes “How come you didn’t tell me about it?” and I go “‘Cause there’s a ton of swearing and we talk about murder the whole time?” And then he was like “Oh, you” or something.
*Georgia laughing*
Karen: I was like “I hope to god my father never listens to this.”
Georgia: I don’t care if mine does. I bought him, I bought him My Favorite Murder shirt.
Karen: Oh nice!
*Karen laughing*
Georgia: So if you see and older man, a distinguished older man walking around New Orleans with a My Favorite Murder shirt on….
Karen: With two cartooney girls on shirt
Georgia: ...that might be Marty.
Karen: Marty!
Georgia: Marty! He’s the best. Um...
Karen: Ok sorry, we derailed.
Georgia: No. We could do this all day.
*Karen laughing*
Georgia: Alright. So My Favorite Murder: I Survived Edition
Karen: Sweet.
Georgia: So, do you know about Alexander Pechunsky? *trying to pronounce* Peshunsky. Peshunshkin! Hold on a second…
*Karen laughing*
Georgia: You know when you like write and write and write all day and then you never say it out loud?
Karen: Yup.
Georgia: What the fuck?
Karen: Oh ya.
Georgia: Should have practised that.
Karen: Yup.
Georgia: Pish-ush-kin. Pichuskin.
*Karen laughing*
Georgia: Listen, he was Russian, okay?
Karen: Uh-huh.
Georgia: And the murdered my people.
Karen: Pushtkin?
Georgia: Pushkin.
Karen: No, I don’t even know.
Georgia: Pichuskin. Pichuskin
Karen: Pichuskin.
Georgia: I think I’m gonna go with that.
Karen: Okay.
Georgia: AKA The Chessboard Killer
Karen: No.
Georgia: Ya. The Chessboard Killer. He’s called that because he was methodically hunting people and sought to kill one person for every space on the chessboard.
Karen: *gasping* I love this. I’ve never heard of it.
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: I love this already.
Georgia: Russian dude. Russian serial killer. He’s also known as the Bitsa Park Maniac because the Bitsa Park in Russia, Moscow, Southwest Moscow is where he did a lot of his best work.
Karen: Wow
Georgia Uh…
Karen: Can I do a high school brag and say I’ve been to Moscow?
Georgia: Have you?
Karen: I went on a trip, like one of those package tours in high school. It was called “Russia, Poland, and the East.”
Georgia: Dude, I wanna go on that!
Karen: It was crazy amazing, and it was 1987, so it was *singing* before the wall came down.
Georgia: I…that sounds…you think that now that I look 16 because I have Botox they’ll let me pretend I’m in high school and go?
Karen: Yup. Absolutely.
Georgia: That’s honestly, like I’m dying to go to like, I wanna go to East Berlin, and which I know doesn’t exist anymore, but.
Karen: It was crazy. It was crazy and there was all this stuff, because it was still…was it still the Soviet Union, is that?
Georgia: Um humm
Karen: Technically? Um, so there’s all these old buildings...
Georgia: Ahhh
Karen: ...that were just left over. It was almost like how I imagine Cuba probably is where it’s like “the great times”...
Georgia: Oh, I wanna go.
Karen: …just leave it there even though it’s this huge empty building that no one’s anymore
Georgia: And driving the same old cars no one had, and it’s like...
Karen: It was amazing. And they had tables set up. I totally have derailed you, but this will be my last thing.
Georgia: Oh I want to talk about this!
Karen: They had tables set up in the street. And you would go up and you would give them, you know, 3 Rubles or whatever, it was like so cheap…
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: and then you would just pick up a little pre-poured glass of warm Coke and just drink a little, like probably 3 fingers of Coke and then give them the glass back. And they would take it and sterilize it and then would pour more Coke in the glass…
*Georgia gasps*
Karen: And it was a little, like card table that was set up.
Georgia: It’s like when you’re running a marathon except…
Karen: Except for Coke!
Georgia: ...then they hand you Coke and you pay for it.
Karen: So you just stop and have a couple sips of Coke.
Georgia: That is so weird!
Karen: And they also had vodka vending machines.
Georgia: Better. I would do that one instead.
Karen: Ya. We drank alot of vodka. We were all allowed to drink…
Georgia: Ya!
Karen: ...because the drinking age over there was like 16. It was nuts.
Georgia: That’s…
Karen: Anyway.
Georgia: That sounds incredible. I would kill to go on a grocery, like I’m obsessed with um, authentic grocery stores?
Karen: Mm hmm.
Georgia: I would go to that grocery store so hard.
Karen: Their grocery stores were very sparsely, uh stocked.
Georgia: ‘Cause it’s like this is the toothpaste, there’s not a bunch of brands.
Karen: Ya.
Georgia: This is toothpaste.
Karen: Ya.
Georgia: Which I’m kinda like let’s do that now.
*Karen chuckling*
Georgia: No wait, no! I’m not a Commu...or a Socialist.
Karen: No, you’re definitely not a socialist.
Georgia: Right. Sometimes I get overwhelmed.
Karen: But…you are a Bernie Bro.
Georgia: That is not, I just want everyone to know that’s not true.
*Karen laughing*
Georgia: I’m actually a Republican. I’m a Trumpster. Is that what they call themselves?
Karen: Ya. Tumpsters.
Georgia: Trumpsters.
Karen: Sorry, ok, go ahead.
Georgia: No, I don’t even. Umm…
Karen: Just, what I’m saying is ask me anything about Russia
*both laughing*
Georgia: Why did you kill my people? So...Pichuskin. He committed his first murder in 1992. He was a student. College or high school? I don’t care. Um… so he was motivated in part by a macabre competition with, like the better-known Russian serial killer Andrei Chikatilo…
Karen: Yes.
Georgia: ...who’s like the creepiest creep, kinda hot creep.
Karen: No he’s not hot!
Georgia: He’s like older dude hot.
Karen: No he’s in no way hot!
Georgia: Little bit older dude hot.
Karen: Doesn’t he have a dent in his head?
*both laughing*
Georgia: Oh no I’m into that.
Karen: Oh ok, sorry.
Georgia: I actually have a thing for...
Karen: Ya, you’re right that’s very judgmental.
Georgia: ...dented heads.
Karen: Who am I to say?
*both laughing*
Georgia: I felt dirty.
Karen: So wait sorry, he didn’t know him, he was just like, he knew what he did and was competing in that way?
Georgia: Ya, he was like. Find someone else to compete with.
Karen: Ya.
Georgia: Like find a like, olympic athlete. Ya.
Karen: Although Chikatilo was kind of the olympic athlete of serial killers.
Georgia: I wonder if this Alexander Pichuskin is pissed that he actually didn’t beat him.
Karen: You know he is.
Georgia: Ya. So…Andrei was convicted in ‘92 of killing 53 children and young women over a 12-year period. So this guy was like “I’m gonna do 64 for a chessboard.” Quick question, 64 on a chessboard, correct? Yes, let’s just go with it.
Karen: How would I know?
*both laughing*
Georgia: So, okay, here’s…
Karen: Correct. Moving on.
Georgia: Here’s a regular fact on My Favourite Murder, his mom says that the beginning of his downfall to becoming a crazy person was when he was...
Georgia & Karen: Hit on the head!
Georgia: Send him back.
Karen: Ding dong.
Georgia: Ya, he was hit on the head by a swing at age 4 and I’m like “unless the swing was made of cinder blocks?
Karen: That’s, but that’s what happened to Richard Ramirez. He got hit in the head with a swing. Like exactly.
Georgia: Swing?
Karen: Yes!
Georgia: They’re made of like, rubber? It’s enough…To get a concussion.
Karen: No I think like in the 70s, 80s…
Georgia: Do concussions affect children more than they do adults?
Karen: Probably. I mean like…
Georgia: You’re a doctor, right?
Karen: Yes. *laughs* Please, ask me anything, I love lying.
Georgia: You’re a Russian doctor, right?
Karen: I think we’ve established that I love to bullshit…
*Georgia laughing*
Karen: So, uh, the answer there is…no, I mean they seem to.
Georgia: The thing is, if you act like you’re right, you’re technically right.
Karen: Ya until I tell on myself the next episode.
Georgia: Right. And apologize.
*Karen laughs*
Georgia: So he, this Pichuskin lured his victims...he mostly was into elderly homeless men.
Karen: Mmm.
Georgia: Not in a sexual way.
Karen: Mm hmm.
Georgia: He would say to them in this park, "Hey do you guys want get shitfaced on vodka?" I'm paraphrasing here. Um, and he would say like, "Let's go to the grave of my beloved dog that's like deep in the park." And he was actually not, he actually really loved animals, he was never...
Karen: That's weird.
Georgia: ...he got hit in the head but he loved animals.
Karen: Ok.
Georgia: Um, then they would go out there and be drinking and he would attack them with a hammer.
Karen: Oh...
Georgia: Man. That's oof. Just the...
Karen: Ya that would hurt alot.
Georgia: Just the like...Ok. That became his trademark. No, this became he trademark, he would and do that then he would push a vodka bottle into the gaping wounds of their skulls.
Karen: Oh no!
*Karen laughing incredulously*
Georgia: It's like a, when you make a watermelon vodka thing, what is that? You know what I'm talking about? When you like, poke a hole in a watermelon...
Karen: Yep.
Georgia: ...and then empty a bottle of vodka in there...
Karen: Ya. He was kinda trying to do one of those.
Georgia: ...and it's like, the 4th of July.
Karen: Maybe he was a frat boy?
Georgia: Ugh, just pickling that brain.
Karen: Just kinda lost it a little bit in the park. Russian frat boys are different than they are here.
Georgia: Oh ya. I'd rather have a frat boy from here than a Russian frat boy.
Karen: I don't know. I don't want to choose. I choose neither.
*Georgia laughing*
Georgia: I didn't know there was a choice, otherwise I still would have chosen Americans.
*Karen laughing*
Georgia: Uh...most of his victims were elderly men, but he did kill three women and one child. The body of one of the women was...I don't...Do you want to know how, that there were tiny stakes hammered into her skull and around her eyes or no?
Karen: Yeah...
Georgia: Ok...so, ya...
Karen: I mean... stakes?
Georgia: Tiny stakes.
Karen: Like...
Georgia: Like not...
Karen: Like, like pitching a tent.
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: or using...oh.
Georgia: Not like, yum yum steaks.
Karen: Yeah.
Georgia: Um, he said once "For me, life without murder is like life without food for you. I felt like the father of all these people since it was me who opened the door for them into another world."
Karen: Eh..that's not true.
Georgia: They're like "I prefer Marty. I prefer my actual dad, but thanks."
Karen: Ya. Uh dads aren't supposed to be like that, actually.
Georgia: Right. Um, so, okay. So let's get to the survivor. Alright?
Karen: Yes.
Georgia: Fucking bad ass bitch. Her name was Maria Viricheva. She was 19 and 3 months pregnant, which already you're like...
Karen: Come on.
Georgia: Like let me get through this.
Karen: Ya.
Georgia: You know? Um, pregnant, and her... the man she was... her boyfriend was a friend of this killer...
Karen: Oh.
Georgia: ...which is like, date someone else. Find better friends. She met him, she ran into him at work. She and her boyfriend had just gotten into a huge fight and so she was pissed off, like hanging out near the Metro station and he saw her and was like, uh, and he had been hunting for a victim and this in February of 2002. I should have started with that. So, he said that most of his male victims, he was able to get them away with alcohol, was the thing that they um, the reason he would go with him. But for women, he said "Women always need to have a financial interest." *pause* Fuck you!
*Karen laughing*
Karen: You don't know me!
Georgia: Man, I like vodka!
Karen: I know!
Georgia: I don't need your fucking money.
Karen: I like dead pets' graves!
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: Stupid.
Georgia: I'll cheers over that. Dick. So he says to her that he has several boxes of contraband cameras...
Karen: Oh ya.
Georgia: ...stashed inside the park.
Karen: No, sorry, women always love cameras. That's really true.
Georgia: If there's some kind of deal going, like a sales deal where like "oh ya this thing I'm going to cut you in on it,"? Just say no. Even if it's true you're still probably going to get arrested.
Karen: There's... you have to pay for things that you want in this life.
Georgia: Right.
Karen: When you try to sidestep that fact, you're, you're, you mess with the wrong people. You end up in the forest at a dog's grave...
Georgia: Mmm-hmm
Karen: ...what have you, and then a vodka bottle in your head.
Georgia: Free money isn't free. Like, just go without.
Karen: Just get a job...buy your own shit...stay out of the forest.
Georgia: It's never gonna be chill. That's gonna be a quote, "Get a job" what was it? "Get a job"
Karen: Any time we list anything in threes, we want you to put it on a poster.
*Karen laughing*
Georgia: There was another one...Shit, Karen is full of quotes tonight!
Karen: I'm full of beans!
*Georgia laughing*
Georgia: Sawny Beans! Oh, my god, okay.
*Karen laughing*
Karen: We gotta get through this!
*Georgia laughing*
Georgia: So, alright, so here's what he does, He's like, "Here's some cameras in here, come on in with me!" And she's like "Ok." Fuck, don't do that. 'Cause she was pissed at her boyfriend, you know.
Karen: It's a great way to rebel.
Georgia: I've done some stupid shit when I'm like pissed at my boyfriend.
Karen: Yah.
Georgia: So, he takes her over to where he says he left the camera which is this well, this like brick well, in the like forest ground. And he lifts the manhole cover off and he's like "Hey, take a look inside!"
Karen: Uh uhh
Georgia: Dude. Um, and she approaches, he grabs her and shuts her into the well. And, she's trying to grasp the edges of the ram of the well, and he grabs her by the hair and just like starts smacking her head against the concrete walls.
Karen: Ugh.
Georgia: Which is so weird that like he didn't even kill her before, it was like almost this fun toying with her thing. But she let herself fall, she said "I realized he would kill me like this so I let go." It's like which side is better, up or down?
Karen: Ya.
*Georgia sighs*
Georgia: And he yells to her, "Take a bath there!" Couldn't come up with something better?
Karen: Ya. That's not funny.
Georgia: Ya. Um, she said, "My head hurt terribly but I wanted to live." So after falling about 30 feet, she, Maria lands in a sewage pipe about a foot in diameter with a stream running through about 3 feet high. Sewage, it's like the sewage line.
Karen: Ick.
Georgia: And I might have gotten some of those numbers wrong because guess what, they were like in metres and shit...
Karen: Oh, no.
Georgia: ...and I tried to like change them, and I...
Karen: Ya 'cause I was like how do you land in a...but basically she, it's down a well and then a slightly smaller thing.
Georgia: Down a well...it's tight, falls 30 feet about, it's a tight little area...
Karen: Ok.
Georgia: ...and she's in like...lets, I don't know, it seemed like, it seemed like waist high rushing sewage water.
Karen: Ugh.
Georgia: Rushing. And it's trying to get her into this like pipe, into this other part of the, um sewage system that she definitely would have drowned in. Luckily she fucking puts her hands to the side and stops herself from going down that pipe.
Karen: Ok.
Georgia: She removes her jacket and boots real quick, man this girl's smart. Um, she was able to plant her feet and hands on the side of the pipe to stop from being swept away by a shit storm.
Karen: Ick. So gross.
Georgia: I know man. Like what a bad day. Um, so she finds another well, I guess she goes through, but it sounds like she was in there for hours. And eventually finds an iron ladder running up the side. She goes up...
*Karen laughing*
Georgia: What?
*Karen laughing*
Karen: Sorry!
Georgia: Say it.
Karen: Like someone had shat an iron ladder *laughing* sorry!
Georgia: Wait, what?
Karen: She's in a sewage thing and then an iron ladder floats by.
*Georgia laughing*
Karen: 'Cause someone had shat it. Don't make me say it twice! It's a terrible joke...
*Georgia laughing*
Georgia: I didn't get it! Ohh! No like she finds it up the wall...
Karen: Got it.
Georgia: It's like in the wall!
Karen: Got it.
*Karen laughing*
Georgia: Suddenly she's like "Ladder!" It's not chutes and ladders.
Karen: We have to edit that part out.
*Georgia laughing*
Georgia: No!
Karen: It's one of the worst jokes I've ever said...
Georgia: No, Steven!
Karen: ...and I had to say it twice!
Georgia: Steven! Don't take that note! This stays in. I've edited out some shit before for you and this is not going to be one of them.
*both laughing*
Georgia: I will just take all the edits I've done for you and put them into one episode and post them.
*Karen laughing*
Karen: Can you imagine?
Georgia: That's the Patreon!
Karen: That's actually a genius idea!
Georgia: 'Cause it won't make any sense 'cause contextually...
Karen: Just random terrible edits...
Georgia: That would be...
Karen: ...of awful things like...
Georgia: ...of all the stuff we've said
Karen: ...me saying someone shat an iron ladder.
*Georgia laughing*
Karen: Ok, please continue.
Georgia: Um, *laughing* so, she finds this ladder up the wall...
Karen: Uh-huh.
Georgia: ...not from someone's bowels.
Karen: I know-uh!
Georgia: I'm kidding, I love it, I love it. This is why you're a comedienne. She climbs up it and she's like, "Well shit, this is like an 80-something pound manhole cover." She can't get it open, she's so close, and then she opens it a tiny bit and sees a woman running from it.
*Karen gasps*
Georgia: Like, leaving, and she's like, "Well, that was my last chance." She's exhausted from crawling for hours through all the gross fucking sewage. She's like, "This is it, I'm dead." But it turns out the woman had heard her screams...
*Karen gasps*
Georgia: ...and heard the manhole cover lift a little, or saw the manhole cover lift a little bit and like fucking ran for, you know help to lift this manhole cover. So, um, she was taken to the hospital, she and her kid survived. Man, I bet like, what is that kid's life like today.
Karen: Well they could, they may have been somehow inoculated but being in all that shit so they're like superhuman, never get sick...
Georgia: Yeah, they're like...Marvel's like, "How do we tell this, this like, story of a superhero?" "Well..."
Karen: "Well, let's see."
Georgia: "Let's see." Um, so she survives. Okay, here's the worst part. Not so, well, here's another bad part. She's reporting the incident to the police, and somehow I've heard, I've read a couple different reasons, the police were like "Nope." And like ending up making her sign something saying that she herself had accidentally fell into the well, and that he had nothing to do with it.
Karen: Whaaat?
Georgia: Ya. Either because she didn't have the correct papers, like citizen papers or the cop was bored, it's like, for some reason they were like, "No, we're not gonna pursue this."
Karen: Wow!
Georgia: Ya. So he went on to claim dozens of lives after that.
Karen: Oh no!
Georgia: Ya, so right now there's a criminal investigation going into the cop who, you know, okayed that. I'm sure nothing will happen. Um, he has two other survivors, one was a 14-year old homeless boy who also got thrown down a well, and in March 2002, he again said he tried to tell the police, but they wouldn't listen to a homeless boy.
*Karen gasps*
Georgia: How are you 14 and homeless Russia?
Karen: Oh my, 'cause that place is, it's terrible. It's all like, it's either the super rich or the insanely poor.
Georgia: Yeah.
Karen: Um, but that also happened with Chikatilo, I saw that there was like a made-for-TV movie where Steven Ray played the cop that was investigating him?
Georgia: Um hm.
Karen: And when they got to the, when they realized he had been murdering all these people, they were like, "You won't arrest him." Like it was as if like, the Russian authorities were like, "We're not admitting that we have this problem."
Georgia: Yeah.
Karen: And I think that is a way that they dictate the cops have to do stuff.
Georgia: Sure. If like some woman had of been, especially because she knew him...
Karen: Ya.
Georgia: ...too because she could be like, "It was this dude."
Karen: Ya it's like they're saying, "We're not, that's not going to be a problem that we're having."
Georgia: And from a couple of the accounts that I read, he like came over to hang out with her boyfriend after that, like she had to see him.
Karen: Noo...what?
Georgia: And he said something like uh, "Hey, wanna go for another walk?" Like, he fucking taunted her.
Karen: That's crazy.
Georgia: I know, but...
Karen: It's also weird to have a habit of pushing people down wells.
Georgia: Totally.
Karen: That's really weird.
Georgia: That is weird.
Karen: It's usually, it's like, you know, they're into the murder part.
Georgia: Well it's weird that he went from hitting someone on the head with a hammer, and in addition to that, he liked pushing people down a well.
Karen: Ya.
Georgia: It doesn't really make, like you should, do one...you should do one, and then the other.
Karen: Ya, pick an M.O. Get your style going.
Georgia: Ya, and then like, with the checkers, or checkers. With the chess? Like, come on, man. Pick one.
Karen: Ya.
Georgia: Um. So...The murder of Marina Moskalyova, Marina Moskalyova in '36, who was 36 in the spring of 2006 was his last murder. They actually found her body with a Metro ticket in it with his trademark uh, injuries, and they found a video of him and her from the Metro station walking together.
Karen: Oh!
Georgia: Ya. So they caught him, he was arrested June 2006, convicted of 49 murders and 3 attempted murders, and it seems like he asked to be convicted for 60 murders.
Karen: Wow.
Georgia: Which is like, fuck off.
*Karen laughing*
Karen: 'Cause he wanted credit...
Georgia: Ya!
Karen: ...for all the murders he had done?
Georgia: Ya. Ya, he got life in prison with the first 15 years to be spent in solitary confinement, so I'm sure...
Karen: Jesus Christ!
Georgia: ...he's gonna be...
Karen: 15 years? You can't do that!
Georgia: Where are we?
Karen: Russiaaaaaa.
*Georgia laughing*
Karen: You nutty place.
Georgia: 15 years in solitary confinement.
Karen: That's...
Georgia: Is there even a reason for that, or is it just punish...we can't give you the death penalty so we're just gonna do this instead?
Karen: Ya I guess so, ya why not kill him? 15 years, that's awful!
Georgia: Did you hear recently in California they passed a law that juveniles can't get more than like, 2 hours of solitary confinement? Which I think is...I almost cried when I heard that,
Karen: Ya.
Georgia: 'Cause it's such an obvious, it's so, it's such an obvious smart thing to do.
Karen: Ya, it makes you think, what's happened that made them pass that law?
Georgia: Ugh, fuck.
Karen: Horrifying. Ya.
Georgia: Fuck, okay so, and he, and Pichushkin has said that he would have continued killing indefinitely if he hadn't been stopped.
Karen: I believe it.
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: Guy's a fucking weirdo!
Georgia: Ya. I just want to give, fuckin', a shout out to Maria for being such an incredible bad ass.
Karen: For, you know what? Here's the smarted thing she did: If you're ever in water, take off anything heavy that you're wearing, jacket, boots, clothes like that?
Georgia: Interesting!
Karen: That's what drags you down.
Georgia: Really?
Karen: It makes you tired when you have to tread water?
Georgia: Huh.
Karen: It makes you super tired to, like, anything like that, boots or anything. Pants.
Georgia: Very interesting, I've never thought about that.
Karen: Mm hmm. Very smart of her.
Georgia: Very. Especially when you're in shit water. She's just, like how can you concentrate on that?
Karen: Ughh.
Georgia: Maria Viricheva. Which like, you don't find alot of stuff when you Google her at all.
Karen: Right.
Georgia: Him, it's like the same shit over and over again. He's gross. There's photos of him, he's a creep.
Karen: He's not hot like Chikatilo.
*both laughing*
Georgia: Shut up! I like 'em, I like 'em dented.
*both laughing*
Georgia: Physically and emotionally dented.
Karen: Inside and out! Uh, well, mine this week, is once again me retelling you an episode, my favorite episode of I Survived.
Georgia: I'm so excited.
Karen: My favourite crime show, if you're new to this podcast, hi, welcome.
*Georgia laughing*
Georgia: Hey.
Karen: My favorite crime show...
Georgia: Should I berate them again?
Karen: ..ya, you can, of all I would say is I Survived, because it's a beautifully produced, it's television well-made. It's one-on-one interviews where people speak slightly off camera, purely telling their story of survival with no re-enactment, no cheesy actors, no shots of anything, just the story which is one thousand times scarier and...
Georgia: Yes.
Karen: ...more upsetting than if you were cutting away to some dumb, like, that show made me realize, those cutaways in other like first-hand...
Georgia: Ugh
Karen: ...story shows just deaden the effect.
Georgia: Ya!
Karen: When a person is sitting there telling you what happened to them...
Georgia: Face to, face to camera.
Karen: ...there's no scarier, no realer, I mean that's it.
Georgia: Honestly I don't...
*helicopter sound*
Georgia: There's a helicopter.
Karen: Just a light invasion.
Georgia: Listen, we're in Hollywood.
*Karen laughing*
Karen: It's how it is.
Georgia: Murder cap. Uh...I don't, I hate re-enactments. They just take you out of it. They're corny.
Karen: Ya.
Georgia: They're not, you can, you can't re-enact the actual violence of what took place, I mean there's just...I don't like it.
Karen: And sometimes on some shows they're so gratuitous, there's like an extra sound effect...
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: ...and the girl's always in a bra, where you're like, "Really?"
Georgia: Right.
Karen: So...
Georgia: Couldn't we say the exception is A Crime To Remember?
Karen: We love A Crime To Remember!
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: Um, ya that, those re-enactments are perfectly done.
Georgia: Dude. They're gorgeous.
Karen: The filming...ya.
Georgia: They're gorgeous.
Karen: So, on I Survived, back to my favourite show, well I should say one of my favourite shows, but it's, all these stories I remember because they're so perfectly told. So, this one I loved because I love the girl who tells the story, it happened to her. And her name is Sarah Brady.
*Georgia gasps*
Karen: And this happened when she was twenty-six years old and nine months pregnant.
*Georgia gasps louder*
Georgia: We both had pregnant women!
Karen: She was...ya that's right!
Georgia: Oh my god, weird!
Karen: Um, and my...Sarah was apparently overdue. So she was like waiting to have this baby at any moment.
Georgia: Fffffuck. Can you ima...like her everything is swollen.
Karen: Everything's hard...
Georgia: Ughh.
Karen: ...you're doing everything for two. Um, so here's what happens. She's registered at Babies R Us. And she gets a call one day from a woman who says her name is Sarah Brody.
Georgia: What year is this?
Karen: This is 2004.
Georgia: Ok.
Karen: Uh, so she gets a call, a woman says uh, "My name is Sarah Brody and I got one of your...we're both registered I guess at Babies R Us because I got one of your packages." So she's...
Georgia: Similar names.
Karen: Yes.
Georgia: Shit, man.
Karen: And so she's like "Oh! Okay crazy, I'll come and get it!"
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: You live on my way to work, whatever. So they make this plan, she goes, and she picks up the package. She goes into the woman's apartment, this woman lives in a basement apartment...Um, she said it was a completely fine exchange, they talked a little bit about how they were both nervous to be mothers. Um, they just talked about you know, whatever, and the, we'll call her "our Sarah", the good Sarah...
Georgia: Mm hmm.
Karen: ...says that she just got the impression this girl was very young and she seemed kind of alone. So she had a kind of a warmth toward her.
Georgia: Yaaa.
Karen: 'Cause she was like oh, you know, and we have kind of the same name and they're basically seemed like they were gonna have babies right at the same time.
Georgia: Aw, ya.
Karen: So, thanks see ya later, great, takes the package, goes home. So a couple days later, uh, there's another phone call, and it's her again going "I got another package for you."
*Georgia gasps*
Karen: And so when she gets off the phone, she is uh, I think... she's having the baby with her boyfriend, they're engaged to be married. So her, her fiance or boyfriend's brother is there, at their house. And she goes, "That girl got another package for me, I have to go get it." And the brother goes, "That's weird. I don't... I have a bad feeling about this, don't go over there."
Georgia: Holy shit, really?
Karen: Ya. And she goes, "No no no! You don't understand. I already met her, saw her face-to-face, she's totally normal and fine."
Georgia: Do you think he's a Murderino?
Karen: Ooh, he could be!
Georgia: I don't think a normal person...like every situation I'm in I'm like, "Is that gonna be a murdery situation?"
Karen: Right! He had his vibe out, kind of.
Georgia: Yeah.
Karen: 'Cause he was like "I don't like the sound of this," basically...
Georgia: Yeah.
Karen: ...said to her, and she was like, "Don't be crazy."
Georgia: A Murderino by the way is just basically someone like us, that we, that someone on Facebook coined, is obsessed with murder.
Karen: Ya.
Georgia: Ok.
Karen: Is that, was that for the first-time person that you attacked earlier?
Georgia: I'm just trying to be nice to them at this point because they're like, I know they don't like me, they're not on my side, they're not voting for my murder...
*Karen laughing*
Georgia: We vote on this podcast, by the way.
Karen: We vote at the end, right? To see who won?
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: Oh god I hope not. Um, so anyway, she's like "Don't be crazy."
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: So the next day she goes back over there. Well this time she says it's a little, the feeling is a little bit different. Just a little, there's a little tension in the air. So she's like, "Great." You know, "here's the package" and she's like "I want you to come back here and come and look at this thing." And she's like, "I really have to go, I have to pick up my son from school, I have things I have to do."
Georgia: Duuude.
Karen: And uh, and she, it was like, she basically kept trying to continue the conversation a little longer than Sarah felt comfortable, you know it was all that kind of vibe. And she said but she just was trying to be polite. So she wanted to leave.
Georgia: You guys, never be nice.
Karen: Ya. She wanted to leave but she's, was, kept airing on the side of politeness. So at one point she was like, she wanted to show her the nursery, she wanted to dadada...and then, but finally Sarah was like, "Look I have to pick up my son from school, I have to go." And then she went into labor pains. Like she said she was having labor pains.
Georgia: Good Sarah or Bad Sarah?
Karen: Bad Sarah said she's having labor pains.
Georgia: Fuck.
Karen: So she starts screaming. Like a lunatic. And good...and she pulls Good Sarah into the bathroom. And that is, that is when Sarah said she looked at her face and her face was the face of a completely different person. Like it was crazy, wild eyes, super scary. And then all of a sudden like a light switch she stopped screaming and said, "Oh I guess that's over." And so...
Georgia: Oh my god.
Karen: ...our Sarah is super weirded out, and is like, "Alright... if you're okay I have to go." And she's like, "Ya ya, just hold on one second I just need to go get this thing." So she goes back into the back of the apartment...Bad Sarah does. Good Sarah is coming out, she looks, she kind of like looks into a room and she said there was a People magazine cover that was framed, and whoever the celebrity was in the picture...she had scratched their face out.
*Georgia loudly gasping*
Karen: And so she was like, "All of a sudden I was like...
Georgia: Psycopath.
Karen: ...'this is wrong. This is bad news.'"
Georgia: She had framed a photo of a celebrity that she had scratched their face out.
Karen: Yes. I can't remember, here, just quick side note...you can't watch I Survived unless you sign up through your cable, uh cable subscription? Like to watch it on Lifetime...
Georgia: Mmhmm.
Karen: ...'cause they're on Lifetime now. And I tried to do it like twenty times, so I could just get the word for word of this middle part of the story...
Georgia: I like it better when you tell it.
Karen: Okay good. But I just wanted to get this detail of like, 'cause I think she said it was either Sarah Jessica Parker or like she says...
Georgia: It's gotta be Brad and Angelina.
*Karen laughing*
Georgia: Let's say Brangelina...and the Angelina part of it is fucking scratched.
Karen: You can get the details if you watch, it's Season 2 Episode 10.
Georgia: Jesus!
Karen: I just couldn't access it through my laptop.
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: Anyhow. She's got the bad chills, she's freaking out. So she's like "I gotta get out of here." Um, she also then sees some paperwork with the name, like a bill or something, with the name "Katie Smith" on it.
Georgia: Oh fuck.
Karen: So she's like, "this isn't good."
Georgia: *squealing* Oh no!!
Karen: So she goes and she's like, "I really have to leave." And, and...
Georgia: Don't say that! Just fucking go!
Karen: 'Sarah' says, "Okay but can I get a hug?"
*Georgia gasps*
Karen: And of course she wants to say no, but she feels like she has to say yes...
Georgia: Don't let people touch you.
Karen: ...for some strange reason.
*Karen laughing*
Georgia: Don't let people touch you if you're not comfortable with it.
Karen: They, she goes in for the hug and when they come out of the hug, Bad Sarah raises up a huge kitchen knife...
Georgia: Arghhhh
Karen: ...and tried to stab her. Our Sarah puts her hands up, blocks...blocks it and grabs the knife...
Georgia: G-g-g-god No! No this is one of my....No! I just scared the shit out of Mimi. My cat. Oh nooooo!
Karen: Uh huh. Has to grab the knife...
Georgia: Nooo!
Karen: ...knocks it away. The knife goes on to the ground, our Sarah grabs the door, runs out, runs up the stairs, is screaming, and running, in this apartment building. Gets to the front door of the apartment building...
Georgia: Oh no.
Karen: ...grabs it, tries to unlock it...Bad Sarah is right behind her, grabs her by the hair...
Georgia: Fuck!
Karen: ...drags her screaming, kicking and screaming back down the stairs, back down to the basement apartment.
Georgia: Oh my god, this sounds like...
Karen: No one in the apartment building hears or comes out or does anything.
Georgia: Oh my god.
Karen: She gets dragged back into the apartment...
Georgia: I don't think I can deal with this one.
Karen: You gotta hang in here with me.
Georgia: Ok.
Karen: Because remember the name of the show?
Georgia: I know.
Karen: I Survived.
Georgia: Ok.
Karen: Sarah's the one telling us this story. She gets pulled back into the apartment...Oh also the first...this reminds me, the first time she went there, when she walked in the door the first time when she was like, "It was fine, no big deal," she did remember, "Oh ya, she did lock the door after me when I walked in."
Georgia: I do that though.
Karen: You do.
*both laughing*
Karen: Alright, so maybe we won't hold that one against her.
Georgia: Still, I get why that would be creepy. You know...I do that for friends, not for people I don't know.
Karen: And also they live in uh, Fort Mitchell, Kentucky. A tiny town apparently.
Georgia: Okay, okay.
Karen: According to what I read.
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: So it's not, it's you know.
Georgia: It's not... and they I gave out my address.
Karen: But. So, she pulls her back in and they, and now she knows she's in a fight for her life, so she's like, "I gotta protect my baby and I gotta stay alive." So, they start wrestling...
*Georgia gasps*
Karen: ...and they go over the couch, they hit the coffee table, they're wrestling wrestling, hitting each other, the whole thing, and finally Good Sarah grabs the knife, stabs her three times.
Georgia: Hoooolyyyy shittt!
Karen: Ya. 'Cause this girl's trying to stab her to death.
Georgia: I thought this was going to be a 'takes the baby' case.
Karen: Well.
*Georgia long gasp*
Karen: So.
Georgia: Oh no!
Karen: Sarah staggers upstairs...covered in blood...
Georgia: Good Sarah.
Karen: ...with her own, Good Sarah, with her own, her hands are completely slashed...
Georgia: oh god oh god oh god
Karen: ...she gets outside and like, gets across the street, and is like laying on the sidewalk or the, you know the, ditch or, she got as far away as she could and then she basically was like out. The cops show up and find her there. Then they go down to the basement apartment and find this girl who's real name is Katie Smith, dead.
Georgia: Holy shit.
Karen: So they're holding...
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: ...Sarah Brady...
Georgia: Sure.
Karen: ...our Sarah...
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: ...holding her, "You just murdered this girl. This friend of yours,"
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: ...they were saying. And she's like, "No, no no no." So, and they're like, "You just murdered a pregnant woman." So, well they go in and they search her apartment. She is not really pregnant.
Georgia: No.
Karen: It was a false belly.
Georgia: Course.
Karen: She's never been pregnant. She's twenty-two years old. She's got the full nursery setup, she's got all the stuff, but then in another room, she's got all kinds of OBGYN equipment?
Georgia: Oh my god.
Karen: Um, including, uh, sorry, including, oh and they uncovered an obstetrics kit. Obstetrics kit, equipped with gloves and surgical scissors in Smith's apartment.
Georgia: Holy shit.
Karen: And they finally put it together, that Katie Smith was planning on stabbing Sarah Brady and cutting her fetus out of her body.
Georgia: I'm so, this is how I thought it was going to end and I wanted to cry.
Karen: Ya. That's what she was intending to do. She had, this girl Katie Smith had told everyone in her family...
*Georgia gasping*
Karen: ...and all her neighbors that she was pregnant with twins. She was showing people a sonogram of twins. She had everybody convinced, and now she was "at the nine month period,"
Georgia: Shit.
Karen: ...and she had to get a baby. And apparently this girl, this, the bad Katie was obsessed with pregnancy from her teenage years.
Georgia: Oh my god.
Karen: So this had been, she had been a little off or whatever, and always had a thing about wanting babies and having babies and this whole thing. So, Sarah Brady, the cops bring her in and once they discover all this other stuff they're like, "Oh, she was trying to kill you," and she;s like "Ya. That's what I was telling you. Like we're not friends...
Georgia: What a badass!
Karen: ...I don't know that girl." Ya. This wasn't some thing of two pregnant women who were pissed at each other....
Georgia: Yaaaa....
Karen: ...this woman tried to kill me. And so, even though she got brought in and questioned, she was cleared of all, she was never charged with anything, she was cleared of all suspicion.
Georgia: Ya!
Karen: UM...
Georgia: Nine months pregnant and she fucking beat the shit.
Karen: And she fucking survived, and then they show - this is why I love her - is because first of all when you watch this episode of I Survived, she's like every girl you went to high school with.
Georgia: Really.
Karen: She's, she's like exactly how you picture her. She's just cute and young and she tells the story like, "then she tried to stab me," like
Georgia: She's like a normal human being.
Karen: She, it's like you know her.
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: I totally feel like I've met her before.
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: And then they show a picture of her with her little daughter! The baby that she has who's...
Georgia: Aww!
Karen: ...completely happy and healthy. And her whole thing is like, "This had to happen, I know now what I'm made of..."
Georgia: *gasps* Ya!
Karen: "...I'm like, this is what motherhood does, this is the power of women..."
Georgia: Ohhhh!
Karen: "... like there was no I was going to let her hurt my child."
Georgia! Oh!
Karen: And it is the most, you just adore her at the end of this episode.
Georgia: Nice.
Karen: And she says like, "I wish that that girl wasn't so sick, but I did what I had to do, and I, you know got therapy or whatever, but I, this is what I had to do. I wouldn't have done it if she hadn't attacked me."
Georgia: I just got butterflies in my womb.
*Karen laughing*
Georgia: For like the first time in like, years.
Karen: Ya. That's the power of motherhood. That's the power of my storytelling on your motherhood.
Georgia: It..that was...Karen can I say? That was a fucking great story telling.
Karen: Did you like that one?
Georgia: Like you...you put, that was a great one. That was one of the best story tellings that we've had.
Karen: Of my life?
Georgia: No.
*both laughing*
Georgia: Ya, you've done better than than.
Karen: I can't recommend I Survived enough...
Georgia: I wanna watch it now!
Karen: ...because their stories become your stories!
Georgia: Ya no no no, I"m watching it now.
Karen: I've told that one a bunch of times.
Georgia: That is crazy
Karen: It's my favorite. It's my favorite. She was also on Oprah, this girl.
Georgia: No!
Karen: Ya.
Georgia: Good for her. What, can, oh my god...tell me about, is it the brother-in-law?
Karen: Uh huh.
Georgia: I wanna know, he just got to the cop station and was like, "Told you so."
Karen: "I fucking told you Sarah!"
Georgia: "What did I say?!"
Karen: He's just screaming that into her face.
*both laughing*
Georgia: "You fucking idiot!"
Karen: She's crying with her hands all bandaged. "What!"
Georgia: How bad would he have felt if she had actually gotten killed or whatever?
Karen: Oh my god.
Georgia: And he was like "I told her so."
Karen: But also like, that's the thing is he said "I have a bad feeling, just let us go over there with you," and she was like, "No, no no." That's another thing is like, if somebody else just says "Well I'll just go with you."
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: What's the harm!
Georgia: What's the big deal!
Karen: Let them go with you!
Georgia: Let's not, let's all make a pact - everyone listening - to not go in anyone's house that we don't know. Ever. Even if it seems innocent.
Karen: Really, like a party or something?
*Georgia laughing*
Georgia: No!
Karen: You're, what you're saying is always take a buddy.
Georgia: Always take a buddy, like...
Karen: Always take a buddy.
Georgia: ...don't be like "Oh come over and like come in I have a, you know, let me grab the letter that I was gonna..."
Karen: Right.
Georgia: No.
Karen: No on has a letter for you.
Georgia: No.
Karen: That's a lie.
Georgia: Say you have allergies.
Karen: Just say "Sorry, I'm really sick."
Georgia: Um hmm.
Karen: You can throw out any kind of period reference, people will let you get out of anything.
Georgia: Mm hmm. Like the 1700s the 1800s, any period at all.
*Karen laughing*
Georgia: Oh my god, I'm so sorry.
Karen: Pleistocene era. No, I love a good pun.
Georgia: Um, uh...my mom used to do a thing where she like "You can blame it on me, if you don't want to do like this thing just say your mom won't let you."
Karen: Ya!
Georgia: You're, Karen and Georgia right now are telling you, you can blame it on mom, or your mom. Or us.
Karen: Say "My friend Karen will get really mad."
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: And It's probably true.
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: Because I have a serious temper.
*both laugh*
Karen: "I'm sorry if I come to that thing with you, my friend Karen," and just point over your, over your shoulder with your thumb, like I'm nearby?
Georgia: Like a vague point, ya, like a vague reference to you.
Karen: Ya. "Ah, sorry, my friend Karen won't let me."
Georgia: Ya. Karen's in the car.
Karen: Ya.
Georgia: But you could just be listening to the podcast. Karen's in the car.
*Karen laughing*
Karen: That's right! We're always with you. And we're always mad about something.
*Georgia laughs*
Georgia: Oh, that was so good! Tell me her name again.
Karen: Sarah Brady.
Georgia: Sarah Brady!
Karen: From Fort Williams, Kentucky!
Georgia: Badass! Don't fuck with Sarah Brady.
Karen: Don't fuck with any, any of her type.
Georgia: No.
Karen: Ya.
Georgia: No.
Karen: It's good stuff.
Georgia: So good.
Karen: I mean, you gotta watch that episode because the way she tells this story, fighting this girl off...
Georgia: Ugh!
Karen: ...is nuts! She looks like, she looks like the girl that would sit next to you in homeroom, telling a story about fighting off a knife attack.
Georgia: Jesus! And somehow it's like, you think of yourself as like, "I have black hair and I would kick this person's ass," and then it's like nope, it's the little fucking tiny cute one.
*Karen laughs*
Georgia: It's always the tiny cute one.
Karen: It's those, it's the ones you don't expect.
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: Well also, imagine like a huge kitchen knife, somebody, even jokingly, raising it up above your head?
Georgia: No.
Karen: You'd just be like, "What... is happening?"
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: I certainly wouldn't catch it with my hands.
Georgia: Ahh ahh ah! Really! I have a harder time with that than...
Karen: It's so awful.
Georgia: That is...
Karen: There's lots of those stories.
Georgia: Ahhh, my god, I really have an issue. I really can't...
Karen: It's gross.
Georgia: ...even. Defensive wounds, man.
Karen: Horrible.
Georgia: Um. That was...Do you want to hear a, um...
Karen: A hometowner?
Georgia: Hometowner?
Karen: Yes.
Georgia: I got one cued. Alright. You know some...I'm not going to say this because then people are gonna send it to me. There's a different email address, some people send it to me and then I know you haven't read it, so sometimes I read it but I don't want people sending them to my email address because... because it's a lot.
Karen: Yup.
Georgia: Because I have anxiety.
Karen: Mm hmm.
Georgia: And stress. Okay.
Karen: There's plenty of ways to get a hold of us like at myfavoritemurder@gmail.com.
Georgia: Oh, ya we should say that myfavoritemurder@gmail
Karen: Ya. Send your hometown murders there.
Georgia: Totally. So many good ones. Alright. So this is from Paula,
"I was ten years old, and it was 1990. "Hey! We're the same age!
Karen: Hey no way!
Georgia: "My brother was graduating from Hickman County High School that year. Hickman County is a rural Tennessee town where maybe someone shoots up the trailer park because someone cheats."
*Karen laughs*
*Georgia laughing*
Georgia: And then it says, in parenthesis, "(Maybe it was my cousin's husband.)"
*both laugh*
Karen: What's her name again?
Georgia: Paula.
Karen: Paula.
Georgia: "In the spring of 1990, the high school was still conducting a type of pre-graduation religious ceremony called a 'back a laurat'".
Karen: Baccalaureate.
Georgia: Do you know what that is?
Karen: We had that too, ya.
Georgia: Oh. I barely graduated high school.
*Karen laughing*
Karen: No, that's a Catholic thing.
Georgia: Okay, um, "It was supposed to be held on Sunday after church with the graduates, usually around 150 kids and their immediate families in attendance. While all of us were at church that morning, um, the school science teacher was turning the school into one giant bomb, that would have went off during the ceremony."
*Karen gasps*
Georgia: "The school assistant principal, Mr. Ron Motherfucking Wallace," the Motherfucking is from me 'cause...
*Karen laughs*
Georgia: "Mr. Ron Wallace had a daughter that was graduating so he came in early to make sure everything would run smoothly. He apparently startled the science teacher, Donald Givens," was his name. "Donald shot and killed him, and since everything wasn't ready yet he had it set to slowly leak gas so that it would be at an explosive level during the ceremony"
Karen: *gasps* Whoa.
Georgia: Holy shit that's some Walter White shit.
Karen: Ya.
Georgia: "He panicked and just set things on fire. So Mr. Wallace being murdered saved hundreds of lives."
Karen: Ohh.
Georgia: "The FBI did say that everything was actually set up correctly and it would have blown if his plan had been carried out. Myself and my entire family would have been casualties. It's such a weird event for me to reflect almost thirty years later." Oh god, is it thirty.
Karen: Wow.
Georgia: "When I think of everything in my life since then. It was a national headline at the time, although being when it was it's hard now to find good info on why exactly he did it. Mostly just town gossipy reasons at this point."
Karen: I bet he hated those kids.
Georgia: Oh my god, ya.
Karen: So much.
Georgia: He was what is he, the science teacher, is that what we said?
Karen: Ya.
Georgia: Man those little shits.
Karen: That's insane.
Georgia: How crazy is that?
Karen: I feel like I've never heard a story of teacher that tried to kill everybody at once.
Georgia: No, he was pissed.
Karen: That's amazing.
Georgia: And that's actually a hundred and fifty kids, that's a lot of kids.
Karen: Ya.
Georgia: That's not a small school, it's not like fifty kids or whatever.
Karen: Ya!
Georgia: Fuck, Paula.
Karen: Paula, that was good.
Georgia: Paula? That was incredible.
Karen: That was a near miss, and guess what? It's another survivor story!
Georgia: Oh my god!
Karen: Kinda accidentally, but.
Georgia: I didn't even do that on purpose.
*Karen laughing*
Karen: Look at us.
Georgia: Look at us. We're good at podcasting.
Karen: And also look who came in the room.
Georgia: He's read for his close up.
Karen: Elvis knows when we're wrapping up...
Georgia: Ya.
Karen: ...and walks in and sits on the couch waiting for his part.
Georgia: He starts salivating when he hears us get sad and be like "How do we wrap this up?"
*Karen laughs*
Georgia: It's the most depres...he's like "Oh, this is, it's time, for my."
Karen: Every time he hears the tone go down, he's like "Ah yes."
Georgia: Oh ya.
Karen: "You know what that means."
Georgia: Every time I stop going (gasping) "Ahhh! Oh my god!" at your stories.
Karen: Can I say the thing?
Georgia: You wanna say it this year? This year? Where are we?
Karen: All year long?
Georgia: Okay first we have to... first.
Karen: Oh.
Georgia: Oh ya wait, oh. Thanks for listening! @myfavemurder on Twitter. Uh, you know, do things.
Karen: Do, rate, review, subscribe, iTunes.
Georgia: Fuck ya.
Karen: The usual stuff.
Georgia: Here we go.
Karen: I think we're number seven on the comedy list again...
Georgia: We're back up in the numbers that's...
Karen: ...which is really crazy.
Georgia: ...so cool!
Karen: Thanks everybody.
Georgia: Thank you guys.
Karen: We love you.
Georgia: Tell a friend about it. Or your uber driver.
Karen: And also, stay sexy...
Georgia: ...and don't get murdered.
Karen: Elvis, do you want a cookie? Want a cookie?
Georgia: You gotta say *high-pitched* "cookie"?
Karen: *high-pitched* Cookie?
Georgia: Oh. He's confused.
Karen: Elvis. What if I give you a cookie!
Georgia: Elvis don't make this part of the edited version....
*Karen laughs*
Georgia: ...of our podcast.
Karen: I can't...He won't make eye contact with me! Elvis!
Georgia: 'Cause he's cross-eyed and he can't!
*both laughing*
Georgia: Elvis you want a cookie?
*Elvis meows*
Georgia: There we...
Karen: God!
Georgia: You wanna cookie?
*Elvis meows*
Georgia: Wanna cookie?
*Elvis meows*
*Karen laughs*
Georgia: Good boy! Don't get murdered you guys!
Karen: Byeee.
Georgia: Byeee!
*Instrumental strum*
Feral Audio
